My version of the "marriage is love" meme

[pne]

Marriage is between a man and a woman.

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Religious, personal and legal elements of marriage

[rho]

Disclaimer: I am not an expert. I am not anything that even vaguely approaches being an expert. I may be wrong on some bits, and all of it should be taken with a pinch of salt.

I split a marriage up into three main purposes. Firstly, there's the religious aspect, which I'm sure you're familiar with.

Then there's the personal element. When you get married, you're making a personal commitment to your partner. You're also celebrating your love. This has nothing to do with the state, but it's still a reason why people wish to get married even if they aren't religious.

Then there's the legal element. You mentioned tax breaks. These are Important. Consider something like inheritance tax. AIUI, in England at least, spouses can inherit from their dead partner without being taxed on it. Unmarried couples cannot, and by extension, no gay couples are afforded this right. This is a clear case of the rights given to two classes of people being different, and is a point of contention.

Whether or not tax breaks should be given to all couples, or taken away from them all is a somewhat different issue, but I strongly believe that the rights granted should be equal. And I rather suspect that the government would have riots on its hands if it tried to take them away, as it would cause things like little old ladies being forced to move out of their house of 40 years because they couldn't afford the tax on it.

Then you've got things like conflict resolution. Regardless of your personal moral feelings about it, divorce law is well established these days, with the aim being, always, to treat both parties fairly and equitibly. In the case of gay couples, this process is much less clear cut. Sure, there may not be children involved (barring the case of gay adoption, where I disagree with you but respect your opinion; I'd happily discuss that too, but I don't think here is the place), but there can be highly emotive disgareements over who owns what. A family pet for instance. Or a home. Should gay couples be denied the benefit of impartial legal adjudication on the same footing as straight couples here?

The question, in theses cases, isn't necessarily what's in it for the state, but what's in it for the people of the state. One of the duties of a state is to provide for its people, and I strongly believe that that means to provide for all its people on an equal footing.

As for what's in it for the state, I can only speculate. I'm trying to imagine a situation where marriage is rare though. There would be a lot more people living independently. More people would live alone, which would, in turn, mess up the economy in quite a big way. I would also imagine that people are much less likely to claim various government benefits (eg, unemployment) if they have a partner who is making an income and supporting them. In a way, it's sort of like a two-person co-operative, with a partner offering the first safety net when things go bad. This, in turn, prevents people from going to the nationwide co-operative that is the state quite so often. Or, in short, I imagine that marriage introduces stability and is good for the economy. If that's the case, then it owuld apply equally well to homosexuals as heterosexual. Of course, I may be missing some good reasons that do differentiate between the two, but I'm doubtful.

So, to summarise: there are currently reasons for marriage which are unrelated to its religious significance. My personal prefered solution is to split it up into multiple separate parts. To use an analogy which I've just thought of, it's like the "friends" concept on LiveJournal. It's overloaded. Different people talk about it, mainly refering to different bits, and if it were split up (for instance, if the religious and legal elements became totally separated) then I think things would work better.

I hope that answers some of your questions at least.

Re: Religious, personal and legal elements of marriage

[pne.livejournal.com]

I hope that answers some of your questions at least.

Some, yes; thanks. It was interesting reading and food for thought.

I believe I tend to agree with what you set out.